Friday, April 17, 2009

Coffee: The new cigarettes

A man stands in the doorway. Leaning carelessly against the frame in a tailored Italian suit, he takes a puff from the cigarette held easily between his index and middle finger. He stares right into his lover's eyes, a boyish smirk on his face.

The female audience faints. Yes, we grew up in an era of smoking coolness. 2005's satirical film Thank You for Smoking, about a tobacco company spin doctor, put it this way:

We don't sell Tic Tacs for Christ's sake. We sell cigarettes. And they're cool and available and addictive. The job is almost done for us!

Then people realized that smoking was associated with just about every major chronic illness on the planet (cancer, heart attack, and stroke to name a few) and cool turned to poison. (As an aside, did you know that Barack Obama smokes? That's so disappointing in a role model...)

What then, is today's vice? Coffee. Yes, that's right, a troupe of medical students and doctors swagger into a conference room, each holding a glistening, tall white Starbucks coffee cup. The aroma flutters by your nostrils...

Coffee brings with it an amicable scent, an air of professionalism, and the uncanny ability to keep people awake. It's cool and available and (modestly) addictive. Coffee is today's cigarettes.


Teddy like coffee said...

woah comparing smoking to coffee just because of the shared addictive property? that's hyperbolic rhetoric!

a_ndy said...

Haha, not just because it's (modestly) addictive... I was just thinking about how everyone walks into seminar with a coffee and they look all cool with their expensive Starbucks. Coffee is like the cigarette replacement, now that cigarettes are evil. They're the new cool.

Teddy I am said...

however, if an unattractive person (middle age, pear-shape men with middle baldness) comes in with a coffee, i don't think it necessarily conjures up any coolness. in fact, i would more so associate him with poor hygiene, job with menial purpose... and coffee breathe stinks..