Saturday, July 25, 2009

If you ever doubted this Man

Today, I watched a chick flick with four girls from work (No, I do not really like chick flicks!). I realize that seeing a chick flick with a bunch of girls that I am not dating essentially pegs me as one of them, but it was one of the group's final outings before the mean one departs for Europe and medical school at... McMaster. Plus, they ate ramen. I love ramen.

The weird one managed to make me feel extra self-conscious by actually counting the number of males in the theatre. Watching girls stroll in three-by-three was an object lesson in just why these movies are called chick flicks. Based on the astounding girl-to-guy ratio, I pondered all the missed opportunities to meet women at such a venue.

Since I watch so many movies, I explained to the weird one that advertisements get repeated ad nauseum if you watch too many movies in succession. Trailers, however, keep the movie's genre and intended audience in mind. Thus, while I've seen every action trailer for the summer a dozen times, our chick flick was unlikely to sport the same trailers as Harry Potter.

My lesson for the night is that the female demographic is targeted 50% by romantic comedies and 50% by horror. Hor-freaking-ror.

Throughout the entire movie, one particularly loud male audience member was laughing his guts out at the jokes. At one point, the movie's main character said something along the lines of, "Why would [insert other male character's name] want to have sex with you if you don't want to have sex with you." Said audience member exclaimed, "That's so true!" How is that true? I'm certainly not basing my attraction to my next romantic interest on her drive to masturbate.

When I returned home, I browsed through my Reading List for new and exciting blog entries. One friend directed my attention to the Gender Analyzer v5 - a tool that analyzes your writing and estimates the probability that you are male or female.

I first attacked the "copy-paste text" feature. My rant on secretaries pegged me as 67.8% female. Oh shit... But wait, when I talk about video games, I am 76.8% male. Maybe I use punctuation too religiously? I vaguely believe that most boys are illiterate.

That's when I discovered the "classify url" feature. As it turns out, you can input an entire URL and have the website classified in one go. What happens when I plug in my little blog?

99.8% male. Never doubt me again.

...

How did others score?

Brutus (99.6% male)
Ruru (100% male - Way to be a tomboy)
Sandlot (68.6% male - Hmm...)

5 comments:

brutalturtle.blogspot.com said...

I'm surprised I score 99% all I talk about is food. I guess bulimia is all the rage with girls these days.

Joyce said...

WHAT! lol...
They don't take into account emoticons, do they?!

Well, at least now i can say i'm more of a man than you. ;D

sandlot said...

LOL. What is this "hmmmm"?!

It's strange b/c at first i just analyzed one post and it said i was like 75% female. That surprised me b/c people have otherwise told me that i write like a male. So i did the analysis again using my url and yup, 68.8% male.

But back to the first sentence, what is this "hmm" for?

shirls said...

!00% ?
It could probably be due to the fact that I don't have very much content.

a_ndy said...

@ Brutus: I imagine some of the more uncommon words don't have as large an impact as the more common ones. I would think style, length, etc. are more important.

@ Joyce: I guess that's a downer for both of us...

@ Sandlot: "Hmm... not bad but still somewhat of an awkward leaning."

@ Shirls: Yeah, well based on what I've plugged in, I have some doubts about the validity of this tool. Guess we'll have to wait for version 6.